Connecting the Dots

Connecting the Dots

I loved connecting the dots
when I was a child.
My crayon would go from dot to dot
and with each movement,
what I saw changed from
a sheet of dots
to an image,
all because I drew a line
that connected the dots.
Life is like that,
just about connecting the dots.
it's like seeing that the tree
is connected to the air,
the earth,
the insects,
the sun,
the rain,
and everything else
which in any way, shape or form touched it.
Life is like a constellation.
We may not see the lines
that connect the events,
the achievements,
the moments of happiness,
and patterns,
but when we step back
and look at the big picture,
we see the celestial story
of our lives
all because we took the time to
connect the dots.

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RIP Sam Rivers

RIP Sam Rivers

You like Limp Bizkit?
Believe it or not – yes.
I had not listened to their music in a while,
but then Sam Rivers died.
I started remembering
the call to unite under a common good.
RIP Sam Rivers
for being a part of that call to unite humanity.
You called for the uniting over shared values
that are greater than any denomination or school of thought.
You may not have always sung it,
but you and the others lived it.
When it came to human dignity,
you and your group were more than
your bands name,
you were all about healing
and encouraging others to
heal through conversation.
I grieve your talent as a musician,
but more so I grieve
your calling as a healer,
as a part of something
which reminded us to never
judge a book by its cover.
RIP Sam Rivers
who always said music was
a way to combine intellect with the soul.
Your music
was an expression of your spirituality.
There was nothing pretty about your music,
but that is what I loved about it.
There was a primitive beat,
which reminded me of the chaos
in which we all came out of.
Listening to you reminded me
of the beauty and the power
which flows from our soul
when we just allow ourselves
to develop our own voice
and be the authentic one
we were created to be.
RIP Sam Rivers
and know that your
power is undiminished
and the music and lessons you taught will live on.
RIP Sam Rivers -- RIP

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If I Were You

If I Were You

If I were you
I would kill myself, she said.
My response to this woman who had offered to help me
was “Well then, I am glad I am not you.”
And I wheeled away
to finish my grocery shopping.
Acquiring a disability
is neither the best,
nor the worst thing in the world.
It just is.
If I am being honest,
maybe it is the best.
it has allowed me to meet people
I may not have met.
It has allowed me to be heard
in ways I was not heard before.
it has allowed me to teach
classes I was not considered for before.
It has reminded me that
I am not my disability
and my disability is not me.
but at the same time remember I have a disability
and also forget that I do.
Don’t assume I am like everyone else you know,
if you know anyone who has one,
because none of us is the same,
but we all are the same.
See we are each human beings.
We each are living our lives
to our fullest.
So if you ever acquire a disability,
like so many people do,
don’t stop being you.
If I were you,
I would live life like I did before,
celebrating each day
and living life to its fullest.

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New Things

New Things

I am about to do a new thing;
now it springs forth;
do you not perceive it.
I heard that so many times,
but today I realized
there was so much
I was not perceiving.
I was not seeing
the new things
springing forth in me.
I could not perceive it.
I could see my efforts to grow and evolve,
but I could not see how
the Ultimate had humbled me
and done new things in me.
I have been waiting for that moment
when I would no longer be ordinary
when I would no longer be ignorant about things.
Then I had this AHA moment
and I recognized that I am ordinary,
that I am ignorant of so much
that I am who I am at this moment
and who I am now
is not who I will be tomorrow
or the day after that.
Each day,
each moment,
the Ultimate is doing a new thing
and it is springing forth in me
in ways of greatness
that I may not immediately perceive,
but when I do
those moments
when I see what is and has sprung forth in me
will be moments of greatness.

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It’s My Life

It’s My Life

It’s my life.
I keep reminding myself each day,
that this life is mine.
it is my responsibility
to take my own life into my own hands.
Each day that I do not take it upon myself
to do something with it,
I am allowing my life to pass away from me.
I am allowing others to control my life,
and it is not theirs,
it is mine.
Each day is a day for me to restart,
to reset,
to rejuvenate,
to refocus my life and
create something new with it.
It's my life
and today and each day
I will take it upon myself
to make the most of my life that I can.
After all,
it's my life.

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My Teachers

My Teachers

When I think about my best teachers
I first think about the ones
I loved taking classes with,
those that touched my heart
and who allowed me to know
I was loved and respected.
They may have been some of my best teachers
academically,
but some of my best teachers in life
were the people I have not liked at all.
They were the ones I found difficult,
the ones who got on my last nerve.
and the ones who I struggled to find
anything nice in them.
The reality is in the school of life,
they were some of my best teachers.
They are the ones who pushed me
out of my comfort zone
and helped me grow and evolve.
They registered me for classes
I never would have taken.
They taught me lessons
I would never have learned on my own.
I am grateful for all my teachers,
the ones who I wanted to learn from and grow with
and the ones who forced me
to step outside my comfort zone
and grow.

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Wasting Time

Wasting Time

Sitting at stop lights (when I drove),
sorting through junk mail,
looking for that thing I cannot find,
waiting in line,
sitting on hold,
waiting for and riding the paratransit bus,
waiting for drs,
waiting for the microwave,
or the air fryer
these are just a few of the ways
I have wasted time in my life.
Moments here and there
that I am sitting
and doing nothing.
Just wasting time.
When you lose so many people in your life
you remember how precious each moment is.
I have a choice,
I remembered,
about how I use that time.
I can continue to waste it
or I can use it like a precious gift
and take those empty moments
and fill them with prayer,
with love notes I text to friends and family,
read or listen to a few pages in a book
meditate,
exercise,  
journal,
or perform a random act of kindness.
in those seconds or minutes
of time and fill them with
an appreciation of our time here
instead of just letting it pass.

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With Every Beat

With Every Beat

We would put our hands on our hearts
and say the pledge of allegiance
and my teacher said
it was how we honored our
flag, country and government.
When I place my hand on my heart now,
I have a completely different experience.
I am not thinking about pledging allegiance.
instead I feel my heart beating
and with each beat,
I am reminded that I am still here
and I am here to be of service to others.
I am here to show radical hospitality to others.
I am here to show compassion to others.
I am here to radiate love, light and positive energy
to all people,
to all living things,
to the entire universe.
My hand on my heart reminds me
of the warmth I feel,  
the things which bring warmth into my life
and the ways I radiate warmth to others.
My hand on my heart reminds me
about the miracles happening within me
and within you
that keeps our hearts beating,
and us waking up each morning.
It reminds me to be grateful,
to be appreciative
and to be joyful
for the miracle I get to feel
with every beat of my heart

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Label Free

Label Free

It was an exercise I gave my queer theory class one day.
Let’s be intentional about trying not to label this week.
Labeling, I explained
creates expectations which affect our vision
and change how we see things.
We see people as the label
not necessarily as they really are.

When I see you as your label
then there are things I think I know about you,
because you are everything I believe about that label
and I miss everything about you that is new and exciting and
you do the same with me.
When we build relationships based on labels
we are in relationship with our expectations,
we are in a relationship with the stories we create,
and only partially with the person for who they truly are.
What if we lived without labels.
If we learned to care about each other
not as a sex or a gender
or as a race or an ethnicity
or a sexuality or
a class
or any other label
that carries with it a story.
Would you see me differently?
Would I see you differently?
Would we see each other a greater clarity
and truer expression of who we were created to be?

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"Wow! What a Ride!”

"Wow! What a Ride!”

"Wow! What a Ride!”
those were the words of a desperate southern gentleman
about his life.
Every time I read his words
Hunter Thompson reminds me how I want to live my life.
His words remind me that I want to feel as if I just slid in
to home plate going wahoo.
I am reminded that life is like a roller coaster.
There are those times I am going higher then I am comfortable
and the times I am sliding, sometimes plummeting down
traveling solely in faith.
Faith knowing that one that bought me to the highest of highs
is the one that will bring me through the lowest of lows.
I cannot appreciate the highs without the lows.
It is this constant journey which guarantees me
as Hunter explained,
I will not be “arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body.”
Rather, I will be skidding in “broadside in a cloud of smoke,
thoroughly used up, totally worn out,
and loudly proclaiming
"Wow! What a Ride!”

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I Feel Good

I Feel Good

Feel free to begin singing the song if you must,
but I was thinking about
the things I do,
which make me feel good,
like cooking for others.
It is not so much what I cook,
but the joy it brings them
and the stress it takes off of them.
It is the opportunity to feed and serve others.
Like my neighbor who thanked me
for giving her a night off and
the joy her son, who has multiple disabilities,
had in eating my 7 cheese mac and cheese.
Or the look on another person’s face
when I gave him 2 loaves of bread fresh out of the oven.
or the day I felt inspired to make a pot of soup for a family
only to find out they were all sick
and had been craving something warm and healing.
When I cook for others,
all I can hear is feed my sheep.
I love watching people eat things
loaded with memories
like Bruce crying over lemon drop cookies,
or a friend of mine who become emotional over
spaghetti, meatball and gravy.
I love cooking to heal others
like feeding the sick during Covid.
Cooking is not the only thing which makes me feel good,
but feeding and serving others
makes me feel good.
You don’t need to thank me
when I do,
just know you made my day
and made me feel good. 

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Life

Life

This path
it is not always easy.
The last few years especially
as we have learned how to
move through life being masked
not seeing people’s faces,
and not knowing who we could trust
being around and who we could not.
Students struggled through school
and then could not attend proms
or graduation ceremonies
other than on zoom.
Familiar life markers disappeared.
People lost employment and
companies had to pivot
just to keep their businesses alive.
Other industries emerged
and became household names
and continue to grow and evolve today.
In the midst of all these changes,
people died.
Those voids remain today with
empty chairs around the tables.
The C word used to be about cancer,
then it became about Covid.
We pretend as if it is gone,
but for some it never will be.
So many places I go still require masking
and I still mask even if its not.
I cannot risk being exposed
and I will not risk dying.
Life is not easy,
but nobody promised it would be.
Nobody promised me a rose garden,
just an adventure filled life
that would be more like a roller coaster;
a crazy ride I would be on forever,
until I got off
and gave thanks for all the adventures
in my life.

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Curiosity

Curiosity

Twinkle, twinkle little star,
how I wonder what you are.
When I was little
I wondered about so many things
like what the stars were
and so many other things.
Over time others tried to teach me
 not to question,
wonder,
or be curious.
Not doing so
however,
made me feel like something was missing.
Curiosity,
keeps one
in a love affair with life.
It is about looking
for the mystery’s in life.
Curiosity
is what keeps life exciting.
It is what makes me feel
like a runner in a race,
constantly wondering
where I should be and
how I can move up.
Curiosity reminds me of the one
time I tried climbing a mountain,
constantly looking for the next place
for my hands and feet.
Curiosity reminds me
that each day is about
wondering,
asking questions
and exploring the mysteries of life.

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Always

Always

As we enter this new year,
I am reminded that it will not
always be 2020.
Today it is 2021,
but it won’t always be 2021.
There will always be life, death, and taxes,
but there won’t always be anything else.
Today I am practicing letting go of
always.
I am letting go of always wanting to be happy,
and just being happy in this moment.
I am letting go of always wanting anything
and just being present and fully experiencing this moment.
I am leaving the always desire behind,
and embracing each moment for what it is.
I give up wanting anything always,
and focus on being in the gift of this moment.

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Teaching and Learning

teaching and learning
are not about what happens
in the classroom.
Teaching and learning
happens in every moment of life.
Everyone I have ever met
no matter for how long
has been a teacher.
Whether I allowed them to teach me or no
was about me.
They were sent to teach me.
Being a teacher has nothing to do with
age,
relationship
or lack there of.
I have learned from
the homeless,
the prostitute.
the professor,
the child,
the repairman
the trash man,
the stranger on the street.
The world is my university,
whether I attend and am open to learn or not
is about me.
I am also my own teacher.
The thoughts and feelings
which run through my head,
and bubble up from inside me
are lessons I choose to learn or not;
be taught or not.
Even this poem
as simple as it is,
is teaching me about teaching and learning

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Talk to Me

When I find myself drawn to something,
I have to stop and listen,
because it is trying to
talk to me.

Anything that is alive
has the power and ability
to share a wisdom, lesson, and
talk to me.

The cracks in the driveway
drew me in one day and
between the cracks I saw the beauty
they were revealing to me.

I watched the birds as
they went from branch to branch
grabbing what they needed
telling me you have what you need

I sat in the sun
feeling the warmth wash over me
covering me like a blanket
telling me I am loved

All that is alive
is speaking to us
bringing us lessons
talking to us,
we just need to listen

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