I say I trust God,
But do i.
I say I am listening,
But am i.
I say I feel God’s presence,
But do i.
I say I can smell God around,
But do i.
I say I can taste God in everything,
But do i
I say I can see God,
But can i.
Like Fred Astaire and Ginger Rogers
They glide
They slide
They look so graceful
They always make each other
Look good.
They skate
They jump
They leap
They make it look so effortless
They always make each other
Look good
As a dancer in life
I hold my wife
We glide
We slide
We jump
We leap
We make it look so easy
And we focus on making each other
Look good
You may not see the practice time
The workouts
The rehearsals
The work we do
Out of our love for each other
And the desire to make each other
Look good.
We dance daily
Finding ways
For our love to shine
For us to express kindness
Towards and for each other
As we dance together in life
Always making the other
Look good
Words
Words are powerful
They can harm or heal
Lift up or diminish
Criticize or empower.
How you use them is your choice
You can speak
Without thinking
Criticize others
Make them feel unwanted.
That is easy.
Or you can stop
and think before speaking
take a moment to think first
ask yourself are they honest, kind and necessary.
Think about what will pick someone up,
empower them,
make them feel good.
Criticizing is easy
praising takes effort
Your words can focus on their strengths
And overlook their weaknesses.
Words are powerful.
How are you going to use yours?
The Lazy Susan
It was Saturday morning when Zoe’s Aunt Joan took her last breath. I feel weird saying Zoe’s Aunt because she meant so much to me as well. When the news came, both of us felt our hearts break and knew our lives would never be the same again. Joanie was one of those people who made a difference in your life. She was the first person in the family to welcome me with open arms. In my last conversation with her, she said, “I am so glad Zoe found you.” It seemed a bit out of character for her then, and even now, but the love and peace in those words continues to minister to me and I know will for time to come.
This whole weekend has been sad as we were also informed of the death of a 20 year old student where I teach. I have come to expect death and passing, but that does not mean I like it. As I have talked about death with friends, they have shared memories of how even years later something will trigger their grief and bring back memories of someone they love. A friend of mine shared that sometimes she just breaks down in tears over the passing of a 17 year old that was near and dear to her heart. One thing we have all agreed on is that none of us grieve the same way. This weekend Zoe has just wanted to read. I, who normally fills my day working through piles has just wanted to cry and sleep.
Read moreBeginnings
Beginnings
Not endings
Unlocking
Not closing
New doors
New pathways
New possibilities
Giving
Doing
Learning
Sharing
Growing
Continuing
Serving
Loving
Seeing the Extraordinary
Having been pretty much unable to leave my home the last seven years, other then for drs appointments, has given me a different view of the world. When I roll down my driveway and get to venture into the world, things overwhelm me. Today, for example, I got to see someone I have not seen in 8 years. As I rolled into the bus, taking me to the oncologists office, I could feel the excitement surging through me. I felt like a little kid. I was going somewhere and nobody was going with me. It was just me and the world.
As I sat at the café before my appointment, I could hear people complaining about how they had to leave the house, the traffic on the drive, the people who had pissed them off on their way there, the person who tried to scam them and of course the overpriced food at the café. I sat and listened and remembered a day when leaving the house and going somewhere was just what you did. I didn’t think much about it, I didn’t see it as a blessing. It was just life.
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Be Silly!
Be silly!
The message came loud and clear.
Be silly!
Silly is selig
Selig is blessed.
Be silly.
Silliness can be sacred
So be silly.
More than a Routine
I generally tell those I journey with that I can tell a lot about their lives by the state of their apartment. Esther de Waal said something similar in her book The Way of Simplicity. She wrote, “An old monastic saying goes that you can tell how a man prays by the way in which he sweeps the cloister.” It made me realize that it is not just how cluttered or uncluttered your living space is, but the ways in which you go about the routine practices in your life like sweeping the floor.
If someone were to watch the way you perform a routine act in your home or office, what would they learn about you. It has made me wonder what others think of or learn about me by the way I do things. I would like to think people would think I was mindful and intentional, but I also know there are routines I am not as mindful and focused as others.
It is easier for me to be mindful and focused when I am cooking because I am constantly thinking, especially now, about what I am eating, where it has come from, what I am doing with it. I treat each of my ingredients with a sense of reverence. However, in all honesty, I have come to realize that I do not bring that same sense of reverence to everything I do, especially chores I have not enjoyed.
Read moreDoing Nothing!
Every morning I visit one of a handful of websites which offer me a spiritual practice or inspiration for that day. This morning, for me, has been hysterical. Every site I visited said “Do Nothing!” I know this had to be the humor of the Ultimate Conciousness. I had been telling my wife I felt tired and wanted to just lay down for an hour and rest or do nothing. Then the messages started arriving. So this morning I am going to go spend an hour doing nothing.
We live in a world where even when we say we are doing nothing, or nothing much, we are doing a lot. For example, yesterday I felt like I didn’t do much, but in reality I did. I read, graded papers, crocheted, spoke with Zoe, prepared three meals, talked with numerous team members, planned for this week, thought about all that I need to do this week, when and how I was going to get it done. Even when it looked like I wasn’t doing much, I was.
Read moreGod is on my side
There are moments that
I know God is on my side.
I feel God’s presence
I hear the soft whispering in my ear
I smell those fragrances only I recognize as holy.
I see those signs that are just for me
I taste the freshness of creation in my foods
In all this I know something quite powerful
God is on my side.
Let It Go
Let it go.
That is what I hear
Words from a teacher
The reminder to release
To stop accelerating the negativity
To interrupt the flow of energy
To just let it go
Step on the brake
Let it go
Just sit in the joy
So I sit in it and
I keep releasing that
Which attempts to steal my joy
Be Free
I sit in my wheelchair and
The plane flies over me
And I pray for them that they
may be free
I sit in my wheelchair and
The plane flies over me
And I hear them saying,
May they be free.
I sit in my wheelchair and
I roll around the block
And I pray that all those who are under me
May be free
Give Thanks
Every morning one of the first things I do is to write down at least five things I have to be grateful for in my life. I have been doing this for years now. So many people I know do this in November in preparation for Thanksgiving, but every day is a day to give thanks, not just one month. So why not give thanks every day. Sarah Ban Breathnach, author of Simple Abundance writes five things every night, but at night I am too brain dead to clearly think about what I am grateful for, so I write mine first thing in the morning as I sip on my morning coffee or tea.
It is not so much about when you give thanks but that you do. It is not so much about how much you have but your recognition of it and ability to give thanks for it. It is so easy to give thanks when life is going well. However, when we are going through a challenging time, sometimes it is hard to give thanks. It is hard to give thanks when you are going through. Yet this is the very time it is most important because doing so helps us to see how blessed we are. Practicing gratitude keeps us mindful that we have everything we need, even when it may not feel like it. For example, for three months of each year, I have little to no income. I can work on saving each month, but then the financial drought season hits. It is a frustrating time as life feels like window shopping. There are so many things I see that I want to do or would like to have, but they are not a necessity, so they stay where they are behind the window. It is in those moments that I have to stop and give thanks and remind myself or be reminded by my wife that we have an abundance. Even when it feels like we are struggling, we are living in a space of abundance.
Read moreIt's About
It’s not one way or the other
It’s not about whether we agree or not,
It’s not about there being A truth
It’s not about how we found our truth
It’s not about who helped us.
It’s about loving and respecting all the paths we are on.
It’s about loving all of humanity, even when we don’t agree
It’s about creating safe spaces, where we can each express our truth.
It’s about giving thanks for all those who helped in their own way
It’s about radiating love to all, even if it is from a distance
Put your Mask on First
It has been several years since I have been on a plane, but I remember the flight attendants always telling us in an emergency to put our oxygen masks on first before helping anyone else. This is similar advice to what I was given during my spiritual formation. Take care of yourself so you can take care of others. Practicing you this month means we have to remember to put our masks on first. Today, I thought I would share a few practical ways to take care of ourselves in our daily lives.
1. Unplug from the energy zappers.
We all have people in our lives who are energy zappers. They are those folks who make you feel like increasingly tired the longer you are around them. When you start to feel emotionally, mentally, and even physically drained around certain people, excuse yourself and find a quiet place to be and let your energy level rebuild. This is not to say that those individuals are bad people, just that they zap your energy and your ability to be present for yourself and thus for others. Unplug, put your mask on and breathe.
Be you
This morning I was thinking about this month’s spiritual practice. I had this epiphany that my wife has taught me so much about the spiritual practice of you. One of the first things she said to me when we were dating is that she was allergic to makeover queens. She defined them as those people who placed conditions on love. They are those people who say I would love you if _________ (you can fill in the blank).
I am not sure about anyone else, but I have known more than my share of people who have always let me know I was not enough of something or too much of something. I never quite fit their approval just as I was. The reality, I came to understand, is that it didn’t matter what I did, I would never be cast in their storyline because I would never have their unconditional love and acceptance.
Read moreTo those who yearn to read me
Over the last several years I have had the blessing of meeting, or at least chatting, with so many people who have expressed how the meditations of my heart have resonated with their spirits and touched their life. Recently, I have heard from a few more people then I normally do. They have told me how they have shared what I have written with others, who have read my writings and now yearn to get to know me better, like a young woman named Melissa. What I have come to realize is that there is something she feels in my writings which is her golden shadow. She has all the gifts, talents and abilities within her that she yearns for, through her relationship with me. She has yet to embrace and embody them.
I so understand that feeling because there are numerous writers and speakers whose work I have admired from afar. It is not that I wanted to be them. But I admired what they had and I wanted that. I wanted that thing I saw in them that I could not see within myself. That is what I yearned for, not to be them, but to have the talent for conveying their wisdom in a way that I had not yet believed I could.
Read moreDancing with Desire
I have long appreciated some of the writings and teachings of Ram Dass. I first discovered his writing while reading a cookbook of all things. He had a quote that reminded me that it is through cooking, serving, and feeding that I am able to not only be of service to the Ultimate Consciousness, but also to have that which I yearn for, a deeper relationship with the Divine.
Recently, I had the chance to read some of his writings and thoughts regarding desire. What I appreciated about his writing is how he helped me to understand that what we yearn for is an emotional system. Many of the things we yearn for in life is associated with some emotional or mental desire. They are not things we yearn for spiritually, but things which do not contribute to our overall well-being. So he guides us through a series of exercises to help us detach ourselves from those things we desire and wish we did not. This week, I thought I would share a few excerpts from his book, Paths to God: Living the Bhagavad Gita.
Read moreYearning for Bountiful
As I have been thinking about yearning the last week, I have come to the realization that this is not about renouncing or pursuing our desires, that which we yearn for in our lives. Rather, it is about understanding our yearnings and the lessons behind it. As I did, I was reminded of a film I saw almost 30 years ago now, called The Trip to Bountiful.
In this film, Mrs. Watts, a sensitive old woman living in the city with her son and his wife, develops a yearning to visit her family home, now long abandoned, in Bountiful, Texas. Her daughter-in-law interprets this wish as sentimental senility, and she convinces her husband to thwart the old lady's attempts to take a train or bus to visit her long-abandoned homestead. Mrs. Watts expresses the elemental nature of her longing plainly: 'I haven't had my hands in dirt in twenty years. My hands feel the need of dirt.
Read moreThe Green Mile
Although this film came out a few years ago, it was just recently that I got to learn more about it and what it has to teach us about the mysterious ways God works in and through our lives. For those who know nothing about this film, it is the story of a man Paul Edgecombe who was once the block supervisor of the Cold Mountain Penitentiary Death row, nicknamed “The Green Mile,” because of the color of the linoleum. It is his story about the transformative power one of his inmates, John Coffey, a 6 ft 8 inch powerfully built black man had on his life. Coffey had been convicted of raping and murdering two small white girls.
Throughout this story we watch as Paul comes to realize that John possesses gifts that defy his understanding. He cures Paul of a urinary tract infection. He cures the warden’s wife of an inoperable brain tumor. John also has the gift of seeing things. When touched by the man who had raped and murdered the young girls he saw the event. By the end of the story, we know that those healed by John gained an unnaturally long lifespan. He saw John’s ghost at the scene when he was holding his wife while she died.
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