Hard healing

Hard Healing

I love it when
the chances to grow and evolve
are easy.
It’s when they are hard
and they crack me open,
making me look at the wounds
and let the tears flow
so the healing can begin.
It’s when I find the hard spots
in my heart
and have to massage them
back into softness,
slowly letting and releasing
the scabs which had formed
over time and
a lifetime of injuries.
Healing is not always
bought about by the easy
things in life,
sometimes it is
the hard healing
which is the most powerful.

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Being Present

Being Present

Being present
for my family, friends, students, customers, and humanity
is important.
Being fully present for others
is about my showing
respect for and valuing those
I am with at that moment.
Being present for you
is my present to you
and my way of expressing
your importance.
Being present
is a gift.
So when I know I cannot be fully present,
I need to express my love,
by not showing up
or at least by saying
this is not the  best time.
Sometimes I have to be present
for me first
so I can be present for others.
So before I make you feel
as if I am not really there,
or I really do not care,
I have to be present enough
to say I cannot be fully present
right now.

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It’s Not Just Me

It’s Not Just Me

I have my moments
when I think it’s all about me,
but the reality is that
it’s not just about me.
We are like all the ingredients in a dish. 
Each one of us brings
a taste,
a texture,
a meaning
to the dish.
Individually we are good,
but together,
we are amazing.
I try to remember how
what I say and do
is not just about me
but affects others.
I am not always successful,
but I do try to remember
to radiate love,
light,
and positive energy
to all because
it is not all about me,
it’s about us.

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Just Because

Just Because

I love doing things for people,
performing random acts of kindness.
I love how they make me feel
I don’t do things because I want anything
or expect anything in return.
I do things just because I can.
For me, there is nothing better than knowing
I have made a difference in someone’s life, or
I have cheered them up,
or lightened their load,
or have done some good in the world.
I do things just because
they are my way of paying forward
for all the good things others have done for me.
There are no expectations,
no need for anyone to even know it was me.
It is just because I can
and so I do.

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A Different Gratitude

A Different Gratitude

I have been thinking about being grateful.
I write in my journal, daily.
usually thinking about what I have
and giving thanks for it.
Sometimes I pick a letter of the alphabet,
thinking about things that begin with that letter.
sometimes I pick people, places or things.
With each there is a sense of gratitude,
for their presence.
Yet lately, I have been giving thanks
for things I do not have
because I know they are bringing joy to someone else
and for that I am grateful.
I give thanks for my friends who have skin art,
because it is beautiful on them
and gives them such joy.
I give thanks for the things I have not had to go through
and the suffering I have been spared.
I give thanks not just for what I have,
but what I do not
and what I have not been through.
I also give thanks for the challenges in my own life,
because without them
I would not be who I am.
Being grateful is not just about
what makes me happy and brings me joy.
It is about celebrating with others
and giving thanks in all circumstances.

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To Those I Should Thank

To Those I Should Thank

Thanks.
It is easy for me to thank the ones I love,
the ones who support me,
surround me with unconditional love,
grace,
mercy,
and affirmations.
it is easy to say thank you
to the ones I want to thank.
Then there are those
who I jokingly say have saved me
so much money.
They are the ones
I would prefer not to thank
but I am truly grateful for their being
these heat sinking missles
that have clearly shown me what I need to work on next.
They are the ones
I love because
they are part of humanity,
but they are not the ones
I choose to spend time with.
Yet I am ever mindful they too
have been used by the Ultimate
to teach me and help me grow.
They too bring me a lesson
which will help me grow and evolve
and in a way that only they can help me.
So to those of you who have helped me
by hurting me,
shedding light on the pain,
the lessons, and
the journey.
Thank you,
for helping me grow,
heal,
and evolve.

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Hatred

Hatred

Hatred.
I would like to say I have none,
but I do.
I just work on not using it.
I cannot deny that I feel it.
but I can also admit it
that I work to not express it.
I feel it in waves,
especially when I am tired
frustrated,
or not feeling well.
I hear it from others,
when someone has gotten on their nerves,
and they just want to vent.
I feel it in the atmosphere,
even when people are trying
to be loving.
I see it in body posture
when words and actions
do not match.
 I taste it in people’s food
when they are cooking for someone
they do not like or
are having a time when
they do not want to cook.
I hear it in the way one speaks
even when they are trying
to be nice.
We so often try not to use
our hatred,
but sometimes it seethes out of us
because we have so much of it
or have not yet come up with
a way to not use it.
Today I am working on acknowledging
but not using my hatred.
Want to join me?

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imitation

Imitation

I remember being told
imitation is the sincerest form of flattery
Please do not imitate me.
Be you.
If there is something you like about me,
then take it,
use it,
adadpt it,
and make it part of you.
Be you.
Be the best you that you can be.
There are many who inspire me.
I want some of what they have,
but I do not want to be them.
They inspire me to walk in peace,
practice mindfulness,
carry an attitude of gratitude,
practice radical hospitality,
but they also remind me
to be the best me that I can be.

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The Listener

The Listener

A friend of mine
describes me as
the listener.
she says I hear the
whispers of the world.
it’s not something
I think about,
it’s just something
I put out in the universe.
It is like there is a message
I spread that says
I am here to listen to you.
I want you to be heard.
Listening is a sacred gift.
it is about more than hearing
what is said.
It is about listening with the soul
and hearing the meaning
coming from the soul.

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Precious Cargo

Precious Cargo

I have friends who refer to their kids as
precious cargo.
They have signs in their cars, which read
precious cargo.
I may not wear a sign,
but I carry precious cargo.
I move through life
with things that are very dear to me.
I carry grace from the Ultimate.
I carry the talens and gifts
I have been given.
I carry the love from the Ultimate
with me everywhere I go.
I carry all this
precious cargo.
I am precious cargo.
in that I have been entrusted
to move through this world
bringing others love,
light,
and positive energy.
The Ultimate see me as
precious cargo.
You and I are both
precious cargo.

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Roots

Roots

When I think about my roots
I find my heart going in multiple directions.
There are the roots of my parents who raised me.
There are the roots of the people who created me.
There are the roots of the foster parents who kept me safe.
They are all part of my roots in their own way.
Who I am today is rooted in their love.
My roots run deep and wide.
Some are like a tap root that is at the core of my being.
Others run wide and help me
love humanity
and not just those in my moment
or in my life.
The connection with my roots
is present whether they are or not.
Thinking about my roots reminds me
I am part of my son’s root system
and my wife’s
and people I do not know.
I must keep the love flowing
both into and out of my life.
Love is like the water of life.
It is what keeps us growing and glowing
no matter what life brings.
The love given to me
is what I share with others
and others share for me.
Love is the root of my life
and my relationship with humanity.

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My Darkness

My Darkness

So often, we are told to fear
the darkness.
Darkness can be
damaging and empowering.
Darkness is about how we approach it,
how we see it,
and how we embrace it.
My darkness has ushered me
into new phases of my journey with the Ultimate.
My darkness has allowed me
to cross into the lightest of experiences.
My darkness has offered me an opportunity
to release and let go.
to grow and evolve,
to learn and transform.

My darkness
is not about evil,
it is about the light
which leads me
to places I could not go
had I not traveled through it
or understood without it.
My darkness
is not permanent, but temporary,
not static, but evolving,
not evil, but divine.
My darkness is a gift
which I accept, learn from and move through.

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My Nap

My Naps

In some monasteries
they sleep with the lights on
to teach their brains
to focus on the brightness.
I love this idea,
but there is something
to be said
about the growth
which happens in the dark.
It is what I love about napping.
It is that time,
when I cuddle up under the covers,
like a seed in the dirt
and allow the fertilizer from above
to speak to me,
whispering wisdom,
offering guidance and
helping me grow
in the darkness of my nap.
Then I break through
the ground of my covers
and re-enter life
transformed and renewed
because of what happened
in the darkness
of my nap.

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Giving Myself A Break

Giving Myself A Break

Honestly, sometimes,
well all the time,
God gives me a break,
even when I don’t.
There are days, like today,
where I am my worst critic.
I have a whole list of what I could have
or should have done.
Then I have to tell myself
to give myself a break.
God does not stop loving me
every time I do or say something I shouldn’t have.
God doesn’t stop loving me
when I am not as good at something
as I would like to be.
God doesn’t stop loving me
or sending people into my life
when I am feeling unlovable.
God sends those people into my life.
to remind me of unconditional love.
Not just that God has for me,
but that my friends do
especially when they tell me
to stop being silly and
give myself a break
All God ever asks is
to do my best.
My best,
not the best according to others,
but mine.
I have to
remind myself
to do my best
and if I did then great
and if not
I can focus on being my best
and giving  myself a break

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Smiling

Smiling

We all have those days
when our smiles are not authentic.
Those days where we know
we are pasting them on,
thinking nobody can see the fakeness,
but they can.
This morning for me was one of them.
I had my reasons,
for not wanting to smile
regardless of how hard I tried.
Rather then focus on what I was grieving,
I came back to my basics
and began giving thanks
and moving my heart from a space of sadness
to a place of gratitude.
As my heart changed,
so did my ability to smile.
If I want my smile to be authentic,
I have to move myself to a space
where the positive emotions and attitude,
as my mother would say,
turn my frown upside down.
I know when my smile is authentic
because if feels good,
is filled with hope,
love,
light,
and positive energy.
Smiling can change the attitude
of the world
when it comes from your heart.

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My Students

My Students

I always ask my students
how do you know what you know.
They talk about their parents and life
and a wide range of ways they learn things.
Yet one of the things I have most in common with them.
Is that we are all grateful for what we learned
and those who taught us.
However, we are both most grateful for
those who taught us how to think for ourselves.
They are not their parents
or their teachers,
or anyone else.
They are each unique and precious individuals
who come to the world with their own questions,
their own desires to learn
and their own ability to create information.
They teach me and each other.
We learn from
each other as well.
We become the teachers and the students
and realize that together
we create a body of knowledge,
greater then anything we have on our own.
My students teach me,
and help me to grow and evolve
as a human being.
My students don’t just learn from me.
They learn with me.
Then they take that knowledge
and teach others how to think for themselves.
This is what I love about teaching,
I get to be a part of a gift that keeps on giving.
I

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Opening

Opening

I strive to stay open
to new possibilities,
but sometimes I find myself
stifling myself.
Fear,
doubt,
closed-mindedness,
make me blind
to the openings before me.
Moving through them,
removing them,
remaining open
to all the Universe is offering me
enables me to grow,
evolve,
transform,
and embrace
all I have been given.
Staying open
allows me to be blessed.
All else,
blocks me from those blessings.

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I Am Unique

I am Unique

There is not,
never has been,
never will be
anyone who is exactly like me.
I am a Divine original.
I was designed by the Divine
and nobody else is exactly like me.
The same is true for each of you.
We are all unique and precious individuals.
We all have something which makes us unique.
Even when you cannot see the uniqueness in you,
others can.
You are worthy of being celebrated.
Even when others are not celebrating you,
Celebrate yourself.
Celebrate your preciousness.
Celebrate your uniqueness.
Celebrate your worthiness.

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Always

Always

As we enter this new year,
I am reminded that it will not
always be 2020.
Today it is 2021,
but it won’t always be 2021.
There will always be life, death, and taxes,
but there won’t always be anything else.
Today I am practicing letting go of
always.
I am letting go of always wanting to be happy,
and just being happy in this moment.
I am letting go of always wanting anything
and just being present and fully experiencing this moment.
I am leaving the always desire behind,
and embracing each moment for what it is.
I give up wanting anything always,
and focus on being in the gift of this moment.

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Mindset

Mindset

One of the most important things I learned this year,
was that it’s all about my mindset.
Everything is about my mindset.
I can wake up and say I am tired or energized.
Whatever I say is true.
What I believe
is what determines my actions,
and that is what determines my results
and that will reaffirm my beliefs.
Whatever I believe will be will be
because I have decided it will be.
What I have learned is that if I don’t like
the direction of my life,
I need to create a new vision for my life,
and then work diligently towards
making it happen.
Accomplishing anything in my life,
begins and ends with me.
I am the artist of my life.
I am the one who creates the vision.
I am the one who works towards attaining my goals.
My and my mindset.
If I want a new reality,
I have to create a new mindset.

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